Sixteen La-Las! Worlds of Fun

Mo's highest rating for something is 'sixteen la-las.' It's a semi-echolalia thing with a Sesame Street video. 'I'm not here to la-la, I'm here to count people who want to la-la,' the Count exclaims.

Ah-ah-aaaahhh.



I decided I should prepare Mo for this trip by telling her about it in advance. Helps with transitions, social stories and so on. So I'm telling her yesterday about how we're going to Worlds of Fun 'tomorrow.' When I was tucking her in, 'sleep all night, get a good rest because when you get up tomorrow we're going to Worlds of Fun.'





I think I created a little night-before-Christmas action because she got up at 2:30 and was basically ready to go.



2:30 in the a.m. Cheee-rist almighty, but early can get awful early with this kid.



She even got Em up.



And I don't think she ever went fully back to sleep. She snuggled in Daddy's bed some, and she played on the computer some, but she was basically in it for the duration.



I had this grand plan to get the park at 10:00, when they open. We missed this by an hour.



But still, what indecently great weather we had. It was 68ºF when we arrived at the park. In August? I mean, really, it was humid, we perspired our share, but we had every reason to expect temperatures 20 degrees higher than what we had. I'm on a roll, too, because even though it's been over two years since we hit Worlds of Fun, last time we had unseasonably cool weather as well.



As for my theory that Monday would mean no lines, well, I guess a lot of other people shared that theory.



And plenty of them shared the same deal-seeking notions. I was going to get the two-for, it's about five bucks more than a regular admission and it's good for any two days. Kind of a limited season passport. If Mo had a seizure five minutes after we arrived, that second day would be a de-facto rain check, right?





But then I found a deal where you got the whole day plus an all-you-can-eat buffet for nine bucks less than a regular admission. Even if the food was garbage (it wasn't), this was the obvious ticket to buy. The meal is served between 3:00 and 4:30 in the Festhouse, and includes fried chicken, barbecued brisket, hot dogs and so on.



We went on some relatively tame rides at first. The Octopus (Hexapus, really, it only has six legs. Four pods per, so whatever 24 would translate as a Greek prefix? Maybe that wouldn't be as marketable as an Octopus.





We did the Zulu (Em didn't, actually, she though it was too scary to go upside down, something that was laughable after her fourth ride on the Patriot).



Then the Boomerang. Which is a decently scary coaster, lots of looping and it brings you back in reverse through the same loops.



Then I messed up. We rode the Fury of the Nile, which is a soaker. Belongs in Oceans of Fun really. And my shoes got drenched. The rest of the day I had trench foot and a soggy, permanent wedgie.



The Mamba had a truly ugly line, and right when we were about through it they decided (belatedly) to add a train, a process that takes a good 15 minutes. It's a great ride, and dried off all but my nether regions and feet, but what a wait.



But in general, the lines were very reasonable. And in fact, given the average age of the patrons, I'm amazed at how well-run the park is in general. I grew up with an inferiority complex, kids I knew swore Six Flags over Whatever was superior, or that if it wasn't a Disney park you might as well not bother. And for the Disney World in Florida, I'll say maybe so. But looking at my kids' Disney videos I'll go out on a limb and say the Anaheim 'Disneyland' might have been the one that started it all, but it's just World's of Fun with Goofy instead of Snoopy. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if World's of Fun's coaster lineup is superior.



We have the aforementioned Bommerang; the Mamba which is incredibly fast but amazingly smooth. The Timeber Wolf which is loud and jarring, and if you ride in the front car like me and Mo did, it honestly feels like it's going to derail a few times. Then there's the Spinning Dragon, which is a small coaster, a one-car ride, but you spin freely on the car, so it's a completely random and utterly breathtaking ride. And the Patriot, where your feet dangle out in the wind.



Not to mention the Detonator, which is really just an elevator designed to scare you to death. The acceleration is beyond frightening. Watching the victims before you does not prepare you: nothing could. It is as violent a way to not die as you could come up with.



Em started out too timid to ride the Zulu, but by the end of the day she was fearless. She did adore her first Mamba pic, though, in which she appears to be not only terrified but balling her eyes out.



The Patriot, by the way, deserves kudos for short lines. Because there are four people to a row, running to trains it cycles 56 people every four minutes, and the lines are very doable as a result. We rode it four times.



After which, we returned to the Mamba where the second train was doing its job of keeping the wait doable as well. We rode it twice in less time than it took for the first run on that one.



While we were riding the Patriot repeatedly (me barefoot in an effort to dry out my feet), Mo kept asking for the 'white wheel.' There's a white ferris wheel right next to the Patriot, but when I asked her if that's what she meant, she said no. When I asked what she wanted to do next, she said, 'I want the blue ride!' Which meant the Patriot, which we did again.




Then, after the final Mamba runs, I was trying to get us out of the park. School starts tomorrow and their Mom was coming to get the girls at seven. I thought I'd checked the time as 5:45 or so after the last Mamba ride but that can't be right. Because it doesn't take that long to walk from it to the Orient (on the way to the car), where Mo renewed her campaign for the 'white wheel.'



I saw the Bamboozler and realized it was white and round and asked her, Is the Bamboozler the white wheel?



She sounded relieved to say, 'Yessss!'



And there was hardly any line, so I figured we had time. And we got on and waited. The dude came around and checked everyone's belts and then some more people go ton. And he checked our belts again, though nobody could have the strength to defy the law of gravity when this thing is going. You'd have an easier time falling off the floor.



Finally I check my phone for the time and it's 6:24. Crap. No way, even if we were already in the car, we'd be home in time. So I dial the artist formerly known as Frau Lobster, and as if that was the queue the operator was waiting for, the ride started. My phone rang and rang the whole time as she tried to call me back.



And even after all that, the girls didn't want to leave the park. They were partied out, though. Even if they didn't have school tomorrow, I doubt I'd have kept them there much longer. Seven and a half hours of rides? Whoa, bubba.


Untitled from Chixulub on Vimeo.

And obviously I went my usual crazy with the camera. This is the hero shot, though. If somehow the other 269 shots got trashed, this photo would be worth the day.