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Sunday, October 23, 2005

Hot Sauce Porn


I was accused by Frau Lobster of shaking with excitement as I opened the envelope from Avery Island: Tabasco had replied to my love letter. They sent a fairly stock PR note and the catalog for the Tabasco Country Store.

Remember that great line when the hobbits get to Bree and one marvels that beer can be served in pints? Tabasco comes in gallons! Yikes! All five varieties can be had this way, and most Americans have trouble getting through a 5 oz. bottle before it oxidizes badly.

They also sell both gallons and 12 oz. bottles in personalized versions. A topper for the habanero version that's made to look like a grenade handle/ring. Smoker chips made from the decommissioned oak barrels that have been used to age the sauce, etc.

And as someone in the ad specialties business, I should be more jaded about novelty items, but Tabasco trivets, Tabasco salt and pepper shakers, seven designs of Tabasco cooking aprons! Bar towels, hot pads, oven mitts, placemats, barware, stainless measure cups and spoons with the handle stamped in the image of the Tabasco bottle, trays, throws, art chairs, wind chimes, wallpaper border, ball caps, Xmas lights...

Not to mention several cool boxer shorts designs, T-shirts, neckties, golf shirts, money clips, etc. Tabasco bikinis!!!

This is pepper sauce pornography. It's getting me hot!

2 comments:

Justine said...

this is scary stuff!

Fancy Dirt said...

My sister had a dog that would "sample" dog poop on their daily walks. She got the idea to take a bottle of Tabasco Sauce with her and pretreat the piles before her dog could get to them. Didn't slow him down a bit. I could picture him thinking, "Mmmmmm Mexican!"