Take my truck, please...

Actually, I like my truck. It's a '95 F-150, the front bumper is a perfect impression of a Lincoln Mark-Something, and the back window sports inflammatory and innacurate bumper stickers.

"I brew the beer I drink" is the least of these: I still have the gear, but haven't made a batch in a couple of years.

"Feed Jane Fonda to the Gay Baby Whales" is one I waited and waited to put on an actual vehicle.

"I Own A Gun and I Vote." Well the latter part is true. And I was supposed to get a gun, but Frau Lobster vetoed it, and the sticker was up.

I also have a sticker that compares the 9/11 attack to an average day in Abortion Land, but it's also innacurate. It portrays 9/11 as being similar in death-toll, but the number of innocent lives taken by so-called doctors every day makes Al Queda look like a fucking humanitarian outreach.

And I don't 'heart' NY, I actually love it.

So anyway, this dented, minty-green truck, the engine is tight, the transmission was rebuilt a couple of years back, Cottman's best, but the driver's side window doesn't roll down. The AM reciever doesn't work, nor the CD player, leaving me with FM only. Alice Cooper's night time show is kinda fun, and NPR is always good for pissing me of, but it's not much of a radio.

It's nice to be able to haul shit to the dump, but more often a problem with the minivan makes me wish I could haul my family, and the bench seat of my F-150 maxes out a seat shy of my family.

But now I'm present with a Buick LeSabre with almost as many miles as my F-150. It also doesn't use oil, has a sound transmission, etc. It even has a fully functional radio, would haul my family, and gets better gas mileage than my truck (no small beer when prices are considered cheap below the $3/gallon mark).

It needs a bit of work, but so does my truck. Like my truck, it's work that could be postponed.

I like being up high in my truck, there are fewer vehicles I can't see around. On the other hand, by being seven years older, the Buick probably costs less to tag.

The air conditioning of both works, but both are questionable, long-term. Again, a 2-1/2 mile commute, why should I worry?

According to Autotrader's web site, both of these vehicles are worth way more than I can fathom without blowing Diet Dew out of my nose. The old rule of thumb was a truck that runs is worth at least $1000. But after four years of zero-percent financing on new cars, there's a disgusting glut of used trucks way nicer than mine.

So, you wanna buy a truck?