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Saturday, July 20, 2013

War Paint

I really didn't have time for this foolish transmogrification. I have my kids this weekend, the Poet Laureate is recovering from a nasty concussion, the garden needs daily harvesting at this point, and my bimonthly freelance project is this weekend—and since I'm going under the knife first thing Tuesday, my deadline on that project is moved up from the usual and in a very firm way.

But I really wanted to do this. I've wanted a purple mohawk ever since Halloween of 2009 when I had one for a whole weekend. I half-assed it then, just did Manic Panic without peroxiding the color out of my hair first. I'm blond, so it should work right?

Turns out, you have to get a few shades paler than Anna Nicole Smith before the bright color really takes. But whatever, it was for a weekend, right? My boss doesn't even like me wearing Hawaiian shirts to work, so you can imagine how well a purple Mohawk and goatee would go over.

So this time, I decided to do it right. Or righter, anyway. I'm off work for four to six weeks to recuperate from my triple bypass surgery. My hair grows fast, there's enough time to grow the funk out a bit and then do a buzz cut, or maybe peroxide it back to a damaged pseudo-blond for my return to work.

So I tried Splat, it comes with the bleaching stuff as well as the color. Man's Refrigerator Syndrome kept me from finding the four year old jar of Manic Panic in the medicine chest, it was hidden in plain site and I looked for it three or four times.

I stained my skin quite a bit, both under the hair in places on my beard and scalp, and on my neck, chest, and hands (the gloves that came with the kit were truly sorry excuses for gloves and I failed to find anything better in the house—I used to keep a box of nitrile gloves for working with epoxy on my rockets, but Mo made balloons out of them long ago).

But I was going for a punk rock thing, and what is more punk rock than a little DIY learning curve showing? I think I'll do this every time I'm getting ready for open heart surgery, a sort of purification ritual.

Corinna really liked the peroxide look, actually, and suggested I stop there rather than add the purple. It was good advice, and I think I might go to that when I turn back into a civilian. Seems like the peroxide look is mainstream enough these days, and it does keep the gray hair from showing.

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